You realise that something just doesn’t feel right in your life. You are feeling challenged – more so than normal – almost overbearingly. Maybe you’re feeling stressed or anxious to the point that you might be having panic attacks or are feeling depressed.

The awareness that you might need a therapist can come in several ways. You might have been thinking about it for a while, or are going through a difficult phase in your life such as a divorce, change of a job, kids moving out or a loss of a close person. Therapy is an effective way to address emotional and mental issues.

Maybe it’s time to get help and not wait until it is worse. So where do you start?

Psychologist, psychiatrist, naturopath, hypnotherapist, kinesiologist, Chinese medicine practitioner – the choices of therapists is endless, as are the modalities.

In this article I will be going over the steps to finding a compatible Hypnotherapist.

“Hypnotherapy is a form of treatment that helps you heal yourself by changing your responses to the experiences and memories hidden deep inside you. These impressions can, unknown to you, have a lasting effect on your present life, health, and wellness. Hypnotherapy can help you get over them.” Resource

As a therapist myself who has also been in therapy, I know the challenges of finding the right help.
“Shockingly”, therapists are also human and no therapist is immune from life’s issues and painful events.

This does not mean that the therapist must have experienced every issue their client has.. Must a heart surgeon have had to have a heart attack to understand the heart?

Apart from that everyone can benefit from a “little” emotional care now and then.

Therefore, I thought it might be helpful to give you a short checklist to help in deciding what you need. These were some of the criteria I used in finding the right therapist for my situation.

Determine the type of professional

When looking for a hypnotherapist there are a few things to consider.
There are many types of hypnotherapy so deciding on which fits you best is also a difficult.

A few types of hypnotherapy include: clinical, medical, and modern and analytical hypnotherapy (which includes modern hypnotherapy).

Clinical Hypnotherapy is a form of treatment given by a certified therapist. They typically have a medical background but use hypnotherapy to complement other treatments they offer. Usually psychologists, psychotherapists or psychiatrists

Medical Hypnotherapy is used for example for IBS (irritable bowel syndrome), pain management or dental procedures. Many dentists have furthered their education to assist patients during treatments.

Modern Hypnotherapy is goal and result oriented. Focus is on the client and the solution to their problems. The advantage of modern hypnotherapy is that it incorporates most forms of hypnotherapy to the benefit of the client. It aims at revealing and removing the cause of a symptom and thus relieving them.

“Hypnoanalysis enables the therapist to locate the sources of inner conflicts, and this is the best technique I know for getting to the root of causes quickly.” –Dave Elman

In reality, as a client, it is not necessary to know which type of hypnotherapy your therapist will use, but feel assured that they aim at using the best method to suit you as an individual.

Not always do we as patients, or future patients, know what we need, more often it is what we think we think we want. Even better is, if we know exactly what we don’t want. The process of elimination will help in making a decision.

There are thousands of different explanations to the different forms of hypnosis. Don’t get hung up on the terminology or descriptions. Trust your instinct.

Once you have determined how you to work on your situation, look for a therapist that specialises in that area. Mental, emotional, psychological or physical. Whatever it is you feel you need.

Talk to friends and family

Even if you feel you’re putting yourself out there and making yourself vulnerable, it’s always good to get referrals. You might be surprised at how many people you know have been in therapy or are considering it.

It is no longer taboo (tabu) to take advantage of treatment – kind of look at it as mind health management for mental wellbeing and self-care.

Referrals might not always be the best match, but it is a good starting point.
If none of the people you know are in therapy or can’t give you a referral for whatever reason, it’s time to do some research.

Search online and in databases

It’s almost like going on a first date. When starting out, keep an open mind. Not all therapies need decades of experience. Credentials are also not everything says Robert Baker PhD a psychologist and program director of the behavioral medicine unit at the Ochsner Clinic in New Orleans. “Even people with great credentials aren’t necessarily great therapists. They may be smart, but that doesn’t mean they have good common sense.”

Check online: websites, facebook, forums and therapy databases. There are many databases on the internet where therapists are registered. This can be quite daunting at first, but doing your own research is key to finding the “right” fit.

Below are a few of the organisations I am a member of and can recommend.

https://omnifinder.net/
https://www.sbvh.org
https://www.ngh.net/

Call them

Once you have found a hypnotherapist that you consider fits your needs, give them a call. Most hypnotherapists offer a free 20 or 30 minute consultation either by phone or online with Zoom or Skype. It is key to notice how you feel on the call.

Often one can feel a little awkward or weird in the beginning. Most often you will have a gut feeling whether you want to work with someone or if it’s a definite “no go”. Not always are their credentials that matter most, but how comfortable you feel when talking to them.

Frequently asked questions:

How many session will I need for my issue?
How long should the intervals be between two sessions?
Am I helpless or powerless during hypnosis?
How should I behave before and after the hypnosis?
What if I don’t wake up?

Do you have the same or similar questions? Trust yourself to ask the therapist. I don’t know which questions you should or need to ask, but you should be able ask any question that concerns you.

And … it’s not the quality of your questions that tells you whether you’re talking to the RIGHT therapist, but the quality of his/her answer. How comfortable do you feel with the answer? Are your concerns taken seriously?

Finding the right hypnotherapist for you

Conclusion

In my opinion, at the end of the day, you need to trust your intuition. This could be THE most important qualification. It is essential to know that there is no one-size-fits-all. What might work well for someone might not as well for you.

Your gut feeling or instinct will help you in making a decision.

If you are interested in finding out more about me or how I work, don’t hesitate to contact me.

What motivates someone to become a therapist?

Why would someone want to be a coach?

And generally why help someone else on their journey?

I find there is nothing more rewarding than experiencing a human being walk away feeling freer, lighter and optimistic of their own personal journey after having suffered emotional, psychological or physical pain.

Knowing that you have had played a part in affecting the life of another person from giving hope when they’re feeling hopeless to inspiring someone to be all that they are capable of being.

Joining a human being on a journey of self discovery, getting excited about the future and the possibilities life does has to offer. To see lives transformed as a result of liberating “aha” moments.

Inspiration and hope

So why did I become a therapist?

It was a late summer’s day in 2010. I’d left work, picked up the kids from school, taken them home and was preparing dinner. I was feeling frustrated with my life and work situation.

We were living on a smallholding quite a bit outside of our village. There were no like-minded families or friends with children. We also lived too far out of the village for the kids to walk to school and kindergarten.  (which by the way is TOTALLY normal in Switzerland).

There was a main road that the children would have to cross, even if the distance was doable. Cars driving 80 km/hr (or faster) and a big curve in the road with high grass made visibility extremely difficult for short people. Also walking through the fields where they might be exposed to other “dangers”.

I had no real friends. Not growing up in Switzerland didn’t give me the opportunity to establish and nurture relationships. I also went back to work fairly early for various reasons.

All the other mothers that I had met or knew, were stay at home mums. They used to meet up for coffee regularly and would go to the park or generally just to hang out with each other for the kids to play. And I was at work getting more frustrated by the day.

Upgrading or personal development

Now don’t get me wrong… I had a great job with enough challenges and variety to keep me busy and active. I also earned enough to allow us to take a vacation once a year. There was just that feeling of missing out (FOMO) somewhere and not developing as a person.

I realised that I needed to either upgrade my training skills for work by either getting an education as an accountant or bookkeeper. Maybe payroll manager or in another field within human resources, where I was employed at the time. The other alternative was to do something totally different to enhance my personal development. Study psychology or something similar?

I never was a good student because I hated school as a kid. (even though I was classified as being intelligent…. and was invited to a special school for kids with above average capabilities). So relying on my salary, going to college or university to study psychology full-time was out of the question. There had to be something else.

Introducing alternative methods of therapy

I had been seeing a kinesiologist during that year, with my kids for issues they were having. Lack of concentration, trouble learning, low self esteem was part of the agenda. Headaches (that were medically examined with no illness identified) and a 6 year old questioning the meaning of life…. also a bit of a challenge.

I was positively amazed at the safe, non-invasive method of helping the kids to regain their self confidence (which in retrospect was a result of bullying). Reduction of  anxiety before school tests, and headaches that at first moved to stomach ache and then disappeared.

So back to the summer of 2010 when a flyer fluttered into our postbox.

It was for a weekend course for Brain Gym® – educational kinesiology. I decided to investigate further and requested various brochures from different institutions.

I have always been interested in medicine/complementary medicine. The basics and structures of health and medicine, as my mom was a pharmacist. It was also always important for me to integrate complementary health for my family and friends and consider methods that may be a little off the “mainstream”.

Possible opportunities

I made the decision, after analyzing all the possibilities, to enroll for a basic course in the fundamentals of Kinesiology. Primarily for my own benefit and maybe to be able to support and assist my kids with issues that might surface.

I was nervous at the thought of going “back to school” and worried that I would be the oldest student. However, I was pleasantly surprised that:

1. I was not the oldest,
2. There were many more people who thought like i did.

I wasn’t a unicorn…

I was grateful for the opportunity to take the year course with the same people.

The trust, connection and friendships we built over the time was invaluable.

Within the first two months I knew that was the direction I wanted to take. I resolved to attend the entire training to become an integrative kinesiologist at the “IKAMED” in Zurich.

Initially I had set out to just develop myself personally. In the meantime, i had gained so much knowledge and experience. the next question was, what do I want to do with all these skills acquired. An am I suited to help other people?

Self confidence and limiting beliefs

I myself had struggled with self confidence and limiting beliefs. As a therapist and knowing the value of getting help, I entertained the thought of further education instead of just getting “therapy” or supervision. Supervision remains a part of growing and developing myself as a therapist and person (in general).

BUT, and that’s the thing about further education, when do you ever stop learning and when do you start being of service to others.

And no amount of reading and learning, can make anyone a better therapist.

Hold your breath for part II, if you can…

You can read more about me here and here

Wechseljahre, Klimakterium oder Abänderung, es gibt viele Begriffe für den Zeitraum vor und nach der letzten Regelblutung einer Frau.

Beginnen wir bei der Einweihung

Es heisst, dass die matriarchalischen Kulturen des frühgeschichtlichen Indiens, Ägyptens und des mittleren Ostens bei Ihren Einweihungszeremonien Henna oder andere rote Pigmente benutzt haben mit denen die Füsse junger Mädchen auf der Schwelle zur Erwachsenenwelt rotgefärbt wurden.

Die rote Farbe symbolisierte das Blut der ersten Menstruation und damit die Fähigkeit der jungen Frau, neues Leben zu empfangen und auszutragen. Die Zeremonie feierte die weitreichende Bedeutung der weiblichen Blutungen in all ihren Ausdrucksformen, das Blut der Menstruation, der Geburt und Fehlgeburt fliesst den Füssen der Frau, die dieses Reifestadium erlangt hat, entgegen.

Quellenangabe: Die Wolfsfrau Clarissa Pinkola Estés Seiten 285/286

Die Weigerung sich dem Zyklus von Werden, Vergehen und Neuwerden zu stellen

Ich befasste mich schon einige Zeit vor den Wechseljahren mit meiner Abänderung. Mein Wunsch war es diesen Übergang harmonisch zu gestalten und bewusst zu leben. Dafür zog ich eine Kinesiologin hinzu.

Von Frauen, die diese Phase bereits gemeistert hatten, wurde ich mit vielen Ängsten und Unwissen konfrontiert.

Eine Frau fühlte sich nicht mehr attraktiv. Sie hatte sich eben neu verliebt und viele diffuse Ängste. Eine Andere hatte heftige Schweissausbrüche und Hitzewallungen. Weil sie das nicht wollte nahm sie Hormone.
Eine Kollegin litt unter enormen Stimmungsschwankungen und war immer wieder in Trauerphasen.

Wiederum von einigen Frauen hörte ich, dass sie endlich froh waren den monatlichen Zyklus hinter sich zu haben. Teilweise weil er mit viel Schmerz verbunden war, einige fanden ihn lästig, für nicht wenige war er mit viel Ekel verbunden.

Wie wird dieses Vergehen und Neuwerden für mich sein?

Durch ihren Körper sind Frauen von Natur aus schon sehr eng mit der zyklischen Wesensnatur verbunden. Man kann sagen, dass Frauen das Wissen der Skelettfrau jeden Monat mit ihrem Monatszyklus zu erkennen geben und insofern von Natur aus Instrumente der Leben/ Tod/ Leben-Natur sind.

Jede Frau mit einigermassen ausgeprägten Instinkten weiss, dass sie im Lauf jeden Monats physisch, emotional und spirituell einen Höhepunkt erklimmt und auf einen Tiefpunkt sinkt und dass dieser Zyklus nur ein sehr untergeordneter innerhalb von unendlich viel grösseren, umfassenderen Zyklen in ihrem Dasein ist.

Quellenangabe: Die Wolfsfrau Clarissa Pinkola Estés Seite 190

Eines war von allem Anfang an klar. Hormone und andere Medikamente kamen für mich nicht in Frage. Ich bin tief verbunden mit meinem Körper, nehme ihn gut wahr und wollte den Übergang bewusst erleben. Den Wechsel von der Frau zur Frau. Ich möchte mich nicht darauf reduzieren, die Zeit wo ich Kinder haben konnte und die Zeit danach. Auch ohne monatlichen Zyklus fühle ich mich attraktiv und fraulich.

Vor ungefähr 10 Jahren war dann der Tag x da. Ich spürte eine Veränderung im Zyklus. Der Fluss war stärker und intensiv. Teilweise erlebte ich ihn als nie enden wollenden Strom. Auch waren Blutklumpen dabei die teilweise heftig aus mir drängten. In all dem spürte ich etwas reinigendes und erleichterndes. Es fühlte sich so an, dass all die Themen, die sich in meinem Unterlaib angesammelt hatten gereinigt wurden.

Ein Schamane bringt diese Blutfetzen mit gespeicherter Wut in Verbindung. So betrachtet konnte sich einiges lösen. In meine Biografie passte das voll und ganz. Sicherlich hatte sich in meinem weiblichen Becken viel Wut angesammelt, tiefe, lange zurückliegende Spuren von Grenzüberschreitungen und Missbrauch.

Dieses loslösen dauerte manchmal mehre Wochen und war für mich grundsätzlich ein angenehmer Prozess. Was sich allerdings irgendwann bemerkbar machte, war eine gewisse körperliche Schwäche und eine Kraftlosigkeit. Der Blutverlust machte sich bemerkbar. Ich fühlte mich schlapp, müde und energielos.
Beunruhigt hat mich das nie. Ich empfand den Verlauf des Übergang sehr erlösend und reinigend.

Symptome

Als einziges verlor ich ganz viele Haare. Dies war eine gewisse Zeit ein grosser Stress, da ich bemerkte, dass ich etwa nur noch die Hälfte meiner Haare hatte. Ich liebte die rote Mähne über alles und wollte sie weiterhin geniessen. Abhilfe leistete eine Ernährungsanpassung. Ich kochte morgens Hirse und allmählich kam meine Haarpracht zurück.

Hitzewallungen

Hitzewallungen sind häufig das erste Zeichen der Wechseljahre. und können sehr unangenehm sein. Den Wallungen folgt oft ein Kältegefühl, es können auch Schwindel und Gefühlsstörungen in den Armen auftreten.

Schlafstörungen

Der Schlafrhythmus kann sich schleichend verändern. Das einschlafen und durchschlafen oder vermehrtes aufwachen kann auftreten, teilweise bedingt durch Schweißausbrüche.

Stimmungsschwankungen

Stimmungsschwankungen treten auf und können bis zu Trauerphasen führen.

Wohlgefühl

Ein Wohlfühlfaktor ist das persönliche Körpergewicht und dessen Akzeptanz. Hier kann es zu Veränderungen im Zusammenhang mit dem Älterwerden kommen.

Physiologie der Wechseljahre

Fast die Hälfte aller Frauen haben keine oder nur leichte Beschwerden und geniessen diese Zeit als Phase der Veränderungen und neuen LebensErfahrungen.

Midlife crisis is a term which was coined in the eighties.

It describes a time between your mid-thirties to mid-sixties. Suddenly, you might have a feeling your life has just passed you by. There is much more for you to experience, yet, you might find yourself bound in a situation, where you cannot just drop everything and do your own thing. You might feel a yearning, the rebel within awakens. You know you must do something, yet, you do not know how or what it is you are supposed to do.

A midlife crisis is not gender-specific but is experienced differently by men and women.

There are many triggers for a midlife crisis.

It can be that your last child leaves home, the death of a parent, the loss of your job – situations, which demand change. This change might occur suddenly and often without any warning. You might want to turn the clock back to the times, when life was good; when you were young, slim and healthy and looked at a life full of options. You might feel like the rug was pulled under your feet all too quickly.

Is it a “midlife transition” or depression?

Mental health practitioners frequently describe a midlife crisis as a time of transition. And indeed, for some people, the call for “there is more to life” might transition to enormous growth. Those are the people who take change with a stride. They embrace every opportunity, and nothing can get in the way of this change to a new identity.
For other people, however, change might not be such piece of cake. They might not even feel the yearning for something more. All they feel is, life is not as it used to be. Maybe they feel stuck, overwhelmed by feelings they cannot place. There might even be a feeling of loss of identity,
In those cases, the midlife crisis has developed into a depression.

When your midlife crisis has become a depression look for those signs:

• Change in eating and sleeping habits
• Restlessness, anxiety or irritability
• You do not enjoy your hobbies any longer
• Physical pains, which do not respond to treatment
• In severe cases even, thoughts of suicide

While antidepressants might lift the depression, they do not cure the cause.

The cause of your feelings is a call from your spirit, inviting you to change.
Now is a time to find out who you are outside the family duties or work environment. You are invited to create a life that suits you. A life that nourishes your body, mind and soul. Right now, you might not know how to achieve all that, but there is help. You need to know, that you have all the answers already within. You do not need to look anywhere else.

Some people realise such introspection through meditation, others through sport or by joining a group or club, they never had time for. Your midlife crisis is a call to find yourself. To discover who you are meant to be and what life is all about.

By saying yes to changes and opportunities throughout this transitional time undreamt-of doors will open for you. No longer will you need to look back at the “good times back in the day”, but you will be able to embrace the future and all the gifts it holds for you.

For more information or a free introductory session, contact me here.

Credit: Torsten Angemeer, https://www.hypnotic-help.de/